Reflect

Nervous Systems in the Stands If you ever need a real-time lesson on nervous system dysregulation, skip the textbook and head straight to...

Welcome to the digital sexual revolution, where people of all genders and sexual orientations are unapologetically writing their own...

My version of a midlife crisis didn’t involve a red Corvette—it came with handlebars and a helmet. Somewhere between raising kids and running a therapy practice, I did something wildly out of character: I signed up for motorcycle lessons. This has been a long-standing dream, and now—firmly planted in midlife—I figured, if not now, when? Learning to ride has been equal parts thrilling, terrifying, humbling, and hilarious. It’s a full-body workout in concentration, balance, and

The first Marine with Complex PTSD I ever encountered wasn’t a client or a patient—it was my father. A proud Filipino Irish American, he volunteered to serve in Vietnam, carrying a fierce sense of duty and courage. But like so many others who served, he returned with wounds that weren’t visible. Looking back now as a therapist, I wish EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) had been available to support his healing journey. ​ Over the years, I’ve had the honor of

As therapists, we aim to meet every client with cultural humility, curiosity, and openness. We meet them where they are—without judgment. I truly believe that understanding a client’s “why we’re here” is often the key to figuring out how to help them get to where they want to go. Time and again, clients begin answering questions about religion, the afterlife, or personal beliefs with the familiar preface: “This is going to sound so woo-woo…” Here’s the thing: everyone’s “woo-

A good golf caddie is said to know the challenges and obstacles of the golf course and the best strategy for playing it. A helpful caddie would know the overall yardage, pin placements, and best club selection at any hole. What do golf and caddies have to do with therapy? At first glance, not much. Besides, engaging in the sport can be therapeutic for some in a not-so-Happy-Gilmore way. I was delighted to hear a client share the unique role and obligation a caddie has to hi

AI has ushered us into a new era. If the internet was once considered the information superhighway, artificial intelligence is the...

Clients have wondered if it’s possible to “do therapy wrong.” How could that be wrong if you are in our session to find meaning, healing,...

I once heard someone liken choosing a therapist to picking out a car. You must know what kind of car you want and even take a test drive...

Tools to Calm the Anxious Mind Worrying comes with the territory of being human in these trying times. We are all too familiar with those anxious, questioning internal voices.   “What if the worst were to happen?” “Could I be doing more?” “Am I enough?!”​   Most of the time, our Anxious Minds are manageable, controllable, and even helpful.  Anxiety is a natural occurrence and motivates us to take care of business. That anxiety might have kicked you into high gear during the p

In the 1990s, Kaiser's Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) Study shed light on how challenging childhood experiences can cast long...

I’ve learned to “take the L,” as my son refers to it while losing to him in sports, which I can accept as long as I strive to "take the...

My 11-year-old son regularly educates me on what is and what is not a vibe. Apparently, this is a very serious assessment, often referred to as a “vibe check.” He insists that homework and bedtime kill his vibe—though, after 20 minutes of listening to him complain about it, I can confirm that his complaining kills mine. ​ As a true (now) Southern Californian family, we sprinkle “vibe” and “dude” into our sentences more often than Jeff Spicoli himself. But for those of us who

Grief is the word we, as mere mortals, use to try to contain the vast, untamable sorrow of losing those we love. I’ve spent years dipping...

“The family is an emotional unit, and an individual cannot be understood in isolation from their family system" —— Murray Bowen, M.D.,...

Psychological flexibility means "contacting the present moment fully as a conscious human being, and based on what the situation affords,...

​ National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 ​ The Psychiatric Emergency Response Team (PERT) Referrals to PERT are made...